Wednesday, April 06, 2005

This Happens to Me All the Time

Mimi smartypants names the "best messageboard thread in the history of the world." Gonores begins with an intriguing hypothetical,
The question: How many 5 year-olds could you take on at once?
then focuses it in a realistic manner:
The specifics:

- You are in an enclosed area, roughly the size of a basketball court. There are no foreign objects.
- You are not allowed to touch a wall.
- When you are knocked unconscious, you lose. When they are all knocked unconscious, they lose. Once a kid is knocked unconscious, that kid is "out."
- I (or someone else intent on seeing to it you fail) get to choose the kids from a pool that is twice the size of your magic number. The pool will be 50/50 in terms of gender and will have no discernable abnormalities in terms of demographics, other than they are all healthy Americans.
- The kids receive one day of training from hand-to-hand combat experts who will train them specifically to team up to take down one adult. You will receive one hour of "counter-tactics" training.
- There is no protective padding for any combatant other than the standard-issue cup.
Board contributors thoughtfully explore the details:
Are you allowed to use one the kids to wield at other kids ala a sword?
Mimi is right. This is exactly the sort of thing the internets were invented for. And reality TV.


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